My story.

First things first I never once will blame my family for the choices I made.

the first time I heard the name “Beautiful Disaster” it all made sense. I thought to myself, wow this really fits me. Its meaning to me – is someone who is beautiful on the outside could be completely destroyed on the inside, but you would never know!


Here it is- my whole life my parents had always been there but never did I see our family as the perfect family- it was constant fighting along with drug an alcohol abuse my father was always on the road mother was always at the bars. My parents divorced when I was about 11, they continued to keep the peace and live together on an off thru the years until all kids were graduated. Well, February 2007 age 13, I sat and talked with my mom feeling scared thinking to myself well here goes all or nothing. I told her I was pregnant, my whole world turned I had no clue what the hell I was doing I could barely take car of myself.. well months pass finally realized I was going to be a single mom because the father didn’t want anything to do with me after telling me to name my son after his deceased brother. More months pass… it’s coming up for me to have him soon, I moved away with a family friend because my mother had 2 jobs and a bad drug addiction.. thought about adoption, thought about so many different things. As I continue to think about that I moved home because I was a little girl who missed her mother even with all the horrible things going on at home, I returned.

Life was stressful up until the day I had him. My son was born 11:07 his first name has 11 letters his middle name has 7 letters I still to this day believe everything was meant to be. I Had my son and got a job,  starting dating which led to addictions, abuse, parties an all the nonsense you do as a teen there for a moment it was like I wasn’t even a mother.

I felt terrible.

To this day I thank my sister for all the help she gave me. Everytime I came home it was a fight with someone so I would turn around and leave  – one day I came home and my mother was throwing all my belongings out of the house. I stopped and thought what the hell am I going to do, from that day on I stepped up and became a parent of this little boy that was my world – I needed to see him grow he was the only thing keeping me in this world. We got our own place,  I went to school and now im an assistant manager of a salon. Im still young I still have a full life ahead of me, but I feel that if I’ve conquered all these things from the age of 13 to 21  – I can do anything…I hope you see the beautiful disaster behind my story.

Also, when I was kicked out of my mother’s house I ended up dropping out in the 11th grade and got my GED. It was hard going thru school – I was in the 7th grade when I got pregnant. I got bullied so oh so much so many nights I wanted  to run away.  After I had him there were so many questions from everyone or omg I can’t believe you have a son, god bless you, alot of things I brushed off my shoulders but it was the hardest thing in my life.  I have mede it this far and I am so glad that I did.



 Original Submission 7/21/15

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July 21, 2015