The motivation to keep fighting no matter the disasters life throws me makes me a Beautiful Disaster.
I identify with Beautiful Disaster because I myself live with crazy flaws and I've always wanted a brand of clothing that wants to empower women instead of tearing each other down.
My story is surviving stage four cancer due to NF, In February 2019. I had left a very abusive marriage. Before I left, I had accidentally hit myself in the face, pulling up my blankets. I felt instant pain, and it lasted for months, but I thought I had just badly bruised my cheekbone. I went to a walk inn multiple times telling them about the pain in my face, and they kept telling me it was a tooth infection and to take these antibiotics, and it should go away. This went on for six months and in those six months, my health drastically declined. I was unable to get out of bed or eat. I slept twenty three hours out of the twenty four hours in a day  my best friends started noticing this drastic change and became extremely worried.
I was taken to Grace Hospital, where they immediately noticed something was very wrong with my face. They did a CT scan as well as an MRI, and that's when they found my tumor, which was already the size of a baseball. They told me they weren't sure if this was Malignant or not and to go home, but if I was to get worse to Immediately go to health science center.
Unfortunately, it did get much worse for me and I ended up in Health Science Center's emergency room where they did a minor biopsy on my face. I remember screaming in pain because they did this biopsy without any local freezing, after my small biopsy was preformed they admitted me into hospital for two weeks and during that time I underwent another biopsy and with in three days the results came back with my greatest fear... stage four terminal cancer.
I was completely alone when they gave me this diagnosis, even though I had mentioned I had one of my best friends Shayla and my mom were on their way. I was told to make funeral arrangements and that they weren't going to do anything for me. I'm thankful for my friends and my family who didn't take that for an answer and helped me fight to get another doctor's opinion, during this time the doctors wanted to study me (kind of like a living cadaver). I honestly felt so humiliated having student doctors poking at my tumor because my cancer was so rare to them. After the humiliation of being studied and put on stage, I was given 33 weeks of radiation to my face.
During this time, I got myself into another very abusive relationship where it tore apart a lot of friendships that truly meant a lot to me. At the time I didn't care or love myself enough to realize I deserved better. All I knew is I didn't want to die alone and have my children find me, so I stayed even though I knew I wasn't safe.
On November 12, 2019, I had major life saving surgery where they removed my whole upper right side of my face they removed my eye, eye socket, cheekbone, sinus cavity, upper jaw, as well as all my teeth. I was in MICU for 1 week where I almost died twice due to my breathing tube getting clogged. It was very touch and go and during this time I some how came to my senses and got out of the abusive relationship I was in and started healing myself.
I've had 10 reconstruction surgeries to try and rebuild my face and during that time I met the love of my life Joey who came out of nowhere and showed me I was truly worth true love and showed me I was beautiful despite hating what cancer took from me. 
My life still has its upside and downs I lost my full term baby boy in July, but still fighting and showing love to everyone!
Without the love and support from my friends, who took the time to stay with me and take care of me after my surgeries, I wouldn't be here to say I made it.
So at the end of my story, I would like to name the beautiful ladies that stood by me. Thank you to Callin, Shayla, Krista and my beautiful mother. Without you, I would not be here today - I love you all. I am now three years cancer free and marrying the love of my life in September. Keep strong and never give up the fights worth fighting.


Tammy said:

Very inspiring testimony and a journey through your life. What could cripple the common woman you stood faced it triumphantly. Us women can be vain at times, so i get that you felt less than beautiful by outward appearance BUT in your inward beautiful radiated (which is difficult sometimes) was as bright as the sun. You rose from the ashes. You are all around beautiful and you deserve good things! My BD hats off to you!

Judi said:

You go girl! You are an inspiration for anyone with a fight to fight and you came out of it all the winner. I too am a cancer survivor so I speak from experience and I wish you the very best. Try to live one day at a time and I have faith you can make it through anything. Good luck! xoxo

Christa said:

First, so I don’t forget….you are an amazing writer. You should write a book. Your story is such a clear example of not giving up and allowing miracles to happen. I am so happy for you!


Kristine major said:

You are will to be reckoned with. God pulled you through so many triumphs, you are truly a many blessings. Your so beautiful inside and out. Don’t you let anyone else tell you different. You deserve so much admiration,
With love ❤️ Krissy

Patricia Parsons said:

Julie!! Wow! You are such an incredibly strong woman! I am absolutely in awe of you! I am sorry that you had to go through all of that shit! I am glad and amazed to see that it didn’t keep you down! You are truly an inspiration! I pray that God keeps you safe and free from evil and harm. I pray these things in the mighty name of Jesus. Amen!

Theresa “T-Baby” Bowen said:

You are beautiful and worthy and strong! Thank you for your story! You are very inspiring and it’s people like you who are very special and you deserve the best of everything!

Tina VerMeulen said:

Julie, your story is that of a true survivor despite all of the negatives that were thrown at you, like you don’t already know this, my apologies. You have truly opened my thoughts that despite trying to get out of my marriage right now that is a drastic mess there is still hope for finding someone who truly could love me for me.
You are an amazing woman & I am so sorry for the loss of your son.
I can truly see hope for other woman through your story
God Bless You & Lots of Love 💗

Laurie Pollard said:

You are beautiful, stay strong and keep fighting. Cancer Sucks!

Toni Hudson said:

God bless you Julie your story is so inspiring!! You are definitely an inspiration and motivation to keeping fighting and never give up!!

Evie said:

Oh wow. I’m so sorry you went through this. I am glad you are pushing through it all. You are still very beautiful. I hope nothing but the best for you in your life!!! Keep shining your light for others to see!!!

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October 05, 2023