Michelle's Story: To All The Girls Out There

Michelle's Story: To All The Girls Out There

I had my first child at 15. My mother helped me take care of her, but she got sick and passed away when I was 17. It was the worst thing that could have happened to me. I was pregnant, had my daughter that was 3 years old and the guy that I got pregnant with the second time was good to me up until a couple years after I had my son. Once I had my second son it started getting mentally and physically abusive. He never hurt my children, so then I had another child and then I had another one 11 months later. After that it was like s*** went downhill. It was like I was a single mother. He worked every day, came home, we get dressed, leave and go to softball. When we got home it was mentally and physically abusive. I've had my nose broken three times, elbow broken, jaw fracture, thrown up against the wall, and my face literally beat with his steel toe boots. Just 3 years ago that happened. I have scars on my left side of my face. I just want all these young girls know once you let them physically or mentally abuse you, it does not stop. They promise they're going to stop, but they don't stop. Once you allow them to do that one time, and it continues, and it's been going on for 30 years. Literally don't get me wrong, I have defended myself, but he is a very strong man. I've never put him in jail and I stayed with him because I didn't want my kids to grow up without a mother and father. I didn't want him to grow up having two different families and I know that's probably selfish on my part, but I always told my boys do not ever disrespect their girlfriends, treat them like Queens and my boys do they treat their girlfriends like Queens, They're 29 and 25 now and my girls are 30 and 24, but it's just so hard to get out. I've almost died. When you don't have a family to turn to, to help you, you don't know what to do. I didn't want to go to a shelter. I felt like when I lost my mother I lost everything because I feel like if she was here I wouldn't have went through all that and I'm 47. I was 17 when she passed, so I had to grow up and teach myself everything I know. I sheltered my kids and let him go to people's house. I'll let their friends come to mine and I always told him do not tell my family, you know my brothers and sisters do not tell them. He never put his hands on my children ever, but as my kids got older, my boys really do not like with their dad and what he was doing. They would always tell me, "just leave Mom. Just leave, why do you put up with it? You could come here and stay". I don't want to put that on my kids, I mean it's so hard and I guess you just kind of get used to it, but I don't want the girls out here to go through the same thing. I don't want them to get used to it like I did because it's so hard to get out of. He helped me with my father 3 years ago. I was going to leave him, but then then my dad got sick, so he helped me with him and it was like now what? After my dad passed away I'm just letting all you young girls know, don't let it happen one time because that one time turned into a million. They tell you they're not going to do it, they swear on their kids, they swear on their mothers, they swear on their long lives, but they lie. They are narcissists. I didn't know who my husband was until I started watching TikTok and he is a narcissist, I learned a lot of stuff about him from watching TikTok and I don't even know my own husband. I don't. He is not the person that I met 30 years ago and I just want to get out and do me - Michelle's time. All my kids are grown now, but I don't know how to do it 😭 I put little stuff on Facebook like crying out for help, but people don't see it I don't say anything but I just put little heads out there just like nobody sees it I just need help really do thank you for listening to my story and I hope this helps at least one person one woman one young girl ❤️

When I read my own story writing this it hit a nerve and I'm still crying, like why did I wait so long? Why - I don't know, but I have been working on myself. I've gotten negative people out of my life. Some women and girls probably have never really read their own story and it is pushing me more to do for myself when I read it. I want to thank you beautiful women for all the help you do for all of us. I found y'all on Facebook a couple years ago. I was going through it really bad and you popped up on Facebook and I've been following you since then. I love all your collections.

Update: I had such a great day yesterday. I hung out with one of my friends and watched a movie. I got a job and then I got home and got a shirt from you guys and I cried. I mean I was so happy that I cried, like so many good things happened to me yesterday. I'm getting back to how I used to be and it's all because you guys inspire me and let me know that I can do what I never did before.

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Comments

Niki DeRico September 13 2022

Michelle, we all get it! Sometimes it feels “safer” to stay w the Monster we know. My story is similar w a few scarier twists. You can do this!