First off let me just say I love the phrase “Beautiful Disaster” and the multitude of meanings this carries.


I love my life and every scar I have gotten along the way. I love adventures, tattoos, motorcycles, traveling, lifting weights, getting dirty and getting dolled up. I am blessed with a loving supportive family and great friends who I consider family as well.

I have struggled with depression, eating disorders, PTSD, OCD, ADD, bipolar disorder and body dysmorphic disorder the majority of my life.

I lost my brother to suicide nine years ago. I have never wanted anyone to know about my illnesses, let alone talk about them.

I have kept my illness hidden for friends and family for the majority of my life. After losing my brother in 2006 to suicide, I ran from my illnesses even more thinking that they made me ugly. It took me almost nine years after losing him to realize that my mental issues don’t make me ugly, that they are actually what makes me even more beautiful as a whole. They have created who I am today. now that I am taking proper care of myself and my illnesses; that out of chaos comes beauty ( which I have tattooed crossed my chest.) I hope one day to see a world where mental illness isn’t something to hide and asking for help is thought strong.

Each day brings a new beginning and a beautiful start to my life.


Original Submission: 8/4/2015

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August 04, 2015