Meet Beautiful Disaster Amber Rain - She has chosen to let her pain transform into love and light.

Meet Beautiful Disaster Amber Rain - She has chosen to let her pain transform into love and light.

WARNING- GRAPHIC CONTENT

What makes me a Beautiful Disaster and why I identify with the Beautiful Disaster Brand. My story started back in July of 1979 when I was born. I have dealt with abuse my entire life in one form or another. It all started when my biological father would leave me in my crib for hours on end, never caring for me in any way. After my mother and biological father split up, she met a guy named James (Jim).
He would beat me in my face with a belt, among many other things. He would even abuse my mother sexually while she was handcuffed to the floor with steel tent stakes (for tough rocky ground while camping). I remember him telling me how if I went to get anyone he would kill me (Obviously I ran to my neighbors apartment to get help). I remember hiding in my closet, pretending it was an elevator that would take me anywhere else but where I already was.
I swear sometimes I could even feel the floor moving at times, like in a real elevator. After my mother left James, she met a nice man named J.T. He was really good to us kids and to my mother. Then I met my daughter Lindsey’s father (Daniel) and stayed with him on and off for 5 years. He would abuse me physically, mentally, spiritually and any other way he possibly could. When I was just 4 months pregnant with my daughter, he tried choking me until my mouth bled and my eyes started to pulsate. I did not know at the time I got with him, but he was also a drug addict. He would also abuse my 2 year old son (at the time) as well. When I intervened, he would abuse me as well. I turned to drugs to escape my reality. I tried leaving him several times and he always hunted me down and sweet talked me into going back with him.
The abuse got even more intense each and every time. Unwillingly, he even thrust me into the sex trade for 2 years. He would not even let me call my mother once every week like I always did. It got to the point that at one time my mother even filed a missing person’s report on me. When we moved from Daniel’s step dad’s house into our own, (I did not know at the time that he owed people money over drugs) we had 6 guys break into our home and hit me over the head twice with a shovel. Luckily I was able to grab my son and run to the back bedroom to get out the window.
I could hear one of the guys who broke in on us tell one of the other ones to go get me and finish me off. I was able to put my son out the window first, then I crawled out the window belly first (while still pregnant) and was able to get safely to a neighbor’s house. Because of Daniel, I had my kids taken away from me for a year and a half until I went to rehab to get my life straight again. (By the way, I have been drug free now for over 13 years).
I had to go to an intense class for a week called (Survivor's week) for people who were abused. Although honestly, the class should have been a lot longer for me than just a week. I have had PTSD ever since those guys broke into our home over 16 years ago. I struggle with self-esteem issues every single day of my life. I find it really hard to connect with people and to get close to anyone because I do not not trust people now a days.
My life really started to turn around for the better in February of 2011 when I met a man named James in the US Army. We fell in love and got married September 17, 2012. We got married right before he deployed to Afghanistan in December of 2012. We have been together for 9 almost 10 years now.
My life now has truly been a blessing. I still deal with self-esteem issues but my husband reminds me every day just how beautiful and amazing I truly am. When I look back on every thing I have been through in my life (believe it or not, this article is the short version. Lol) I am truly amazed at the person I have become. Instead of letting my past affect me negatively and become a vile person, I have chose to become a survivor and let my pain transform into love and light.

 

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Comments

Donna Walker 8 days ago

Amber rain 💜💜💜
Hey Beautiful Lady
Thank You So Much For Sharing Your Story ❤️
I’m So Sorry You Had To Go Through What you Did Your Such A Brave And Strong Lady Please Never Ever Forget That !! You’ve Been Through So Much And Deserve So Much Happiness And Love I’m So Glad You Found It !! I Hope Your Kids Know What A amazingly Strong Mama They Have ❤️💗
I Like You Have Been Through Mental And Physical Abuse ..Not As Bad As yours But Bad Enough To Affect Me Alot So I Can Relate To Your Story I Came Across Beautiful Disaster Clothing On A Ad And The Name Is Me All Over But You Know What I’m Not Ashamed I Embrace it 😉 Im Always Visiting The Site To Browse Because Im in love With There Clothing But Unfortunately Don’t Own Any And I Don’t Think I’ll Ever Be able To Own Any In The Near Future Because Of My Financial Situation..Oh How I Wish I Could Treat My Self what I do have goes to my boys 😍 my main priority is them and always will be.
Anyway remember stay strong Beautiful !! You truly are amazing xoxo

Amber Rain June 8 2020

Christie Cordon and Christy, thank you for your beautiful words. They mean a lot. Hugs.

Christie Cordon June 8 2020

Thank you for sharing your story, you have true grit! Keep the words in the mirror positive and a smile that does not stop.

Christy June 7 2020

Beautiful survivor I myself have had some nasty shoes I have had to wear like you it started when I was born maybe before I was told once by my dad that when my mother was pregnant with me he kicked her so hard off a bed she slammed into a wall belly first I suffer from bpd anxiety depression and ptsd. I found an add for this clothing line and it’s funny my best friend used to always say she was a beautiful disaster for my birthday which was yesterday I ordered some clothes I will wear them with pride as women we stand strong but silent I admire what you all are doing my love goes out to you. Thank you for creating a movement of beauty and strength through so much pain you’ve shown me I can get past my horror of a life and be beautiful again 🙏❤️

Amber Rain June 7 2020

Thank you Sandy. :)

Sandy Music June 7 2020

Girl I envy you! Your a very strong, amazing & Beautiful Woman. Stay strong in your game and never let anyone tell you any different, especially not a man. I am so glad you are finally happy, he is one lucky man. ❤️❤️❤️