I am the face of thousands, the face of Domestic Violence. I am a Beautiful Disaster, because I don’t take it. Somehow, someway, I survive.
In 2002 my 2nd child was born, and my husband was T-Boned by a drunk driver. He suffered a frontal lobe brain injury amongst many other injuries. As time moved on, he saw the doctors less and less, feeling he was fine. But something just wasn’t right. Then one night, because the dog barked, he fractured my knee, broke my nose, knocked out most of my teeth and broke my foot. I began 2 horrific years of not walking, being abused and trying to keep the kids safe from him. Thankfully, his work kept him away 90% of the time.
In late 2003 I was able to get an order of protection and move the kids back to my home state of Ca. Unfortunately he followed, there was another horrible incident but this time I was in California and was able to prosecute where the kids and I would be safe....as safe as possible.
A single mom in Marin County still not fully mobile and a husband now in prison, I set out to raise the kids alone. My kids - raised MY way. It was really a blessing in disguise. I quickly realized pity parties were not going to benefit anyone and I had these two small kids relying on me to keep my shit together. So I did, as best I could.
Eventually, I ended up dating a man and several years later we married.
That knee that was fractured was only temporarily repaired. They said by 2008 I would need a full replacement, but there was never really time. I had a blended family of “his and mine”, 3 kids, 1 boy and 2 girls. He is the Chief of a Tug Boat and gone weeks at a time.
By 18 my son is in the Army and the girls are finishing Jr. High, playing sports and we own a restaurant. I have zero down time but every minute on my feet is worth the pain. I learn to laugh at any and all adversity and carry on.
It’s now 2018. My son is 26 and lives with his girlfriend Katy in Illinois, my daughter is playing Division 1 Softball in College and my third, my child from another mother, well he is transitioning from female to male. All three of my kids kick ass, just ask me, I will tell you for hours.
And me? I’m sitting here with my very first Beautiful Disaster sweatshirt that I ordered the night before surgery and 20 staples in my knee. I finally “found” the time. And if this pain doesn’t make me invincible, nothing will. But that is physical strength.
What makes me a Beautiful Disaster is the ability to be literally bitch slapped by life and laugh in its face. I may not do it right but it all turns out ok. I’m 47, my hair changes colors much like a baboons ass, my nails are often to long, I listen to music too loud and my favorite tat says “unapologetically me” but I still see the value in every person. I never became jaded. That makes me, a Perfectly Imperfect, Beautiful Disaster!
Now, catch me if you can, this new knee and I are about to fuck some shit up!!!