JoAnn Tyrell: She Is Slowly Becoming Proud
Posted on 07 December 2018
Hello My name is JoAnn .. and I’m a beautiful disaster because I’m perfectly imperfect.
I’m a 36 year old mother of 4 beautiful children. Four kids from four different men whom I still love dearly and would help if it was to better them in the way I have. Currently I am with my youngest daughters father. Have been with him for almost 15 years. Every time we split ways I ended up wasted and pregnant. I have not only self taught myself to be a mother but I’ve also taught myself over the years to work hard to get yours.
I’m 5 years sober. I went three hard years with alcoholism and 14+ of tobacco. I struggled when I was sober with who I am where I’m from and what I’ve dealt with as a child. I was molested as a child in to separate occasions by two different men. One of them being of relation and another being a close family friend. Lost a very close uncle at the young age of 12 . Went to his murder trial. Not anything I would have wished on anyone!
My mother and stepfather separated shortly after that where I was closest with my stepfather. My mother and I moved 6 1/2 hours away to not see my stepfather again for about four years or have contact with, this was extremely difficult. It was my freshman year in a new town where I knew no one didn’t not fit in. The end of my sophomore year I started to believe I was just not meant to be loved and felt very distant. This is when I first started smoking cigarettes and drinking . Already smoked marijuana and tripped.
My eighth grade and freshman year I had perfect attendance and straight A's. This didn’t matter to anyone really so. Downward I spiraled. I ended my teenage high school career with thirteen minor consumptions six Tobacco violations , a shoplifting charge, two possessions, and a simple assault . That ended up putting me in a boot camp for four and a half months. Was the first Tyrell in my family to graduate high school.
My family was small and not close at all. My stepfather gave me a car that we had growing up for graduating high school that I didn’t have for a week before my new stepfather blew up by putting diesel in the oil?! At 20 I had my first child, 22 with my second, 24 for the third and my last child at 27. When pregnant with my last child at 27 I attempted to go to school to get better work . Decided schooling while pregnant and working part time with three younger kids at home isn’t the easiest. I decided to drop all the classes and work. I’ve worked at DQ since 2006.
Getting to where I’m now was hard but totally worth it!
Today I’m a proud mother that may only work at DQ but my kids and I are provided for plus have some toys! I’m am a proud owner of a Harley and ride every chance I get. My kids each own their own dirt bikes or 4 wheeler that we all get to go play on once in a while. I at thirty five finally decided to indulge in myself and for the first time ever I am happy about what I’ve overcome. Happy to be myself. Never too late right.
Lately I’ve been self involved focusing on myself and loving myself getting out of my comfort zone and living! Slowly becoming proud instead of ashamed. Knowing I’m worthy of good and love. Most importantly be comfortable being flawed to an extent it has left me stained. That’s what makes me, me. I’m empowered to the fullest at this middle age! I’ve got so much strength and love to keep loving unconditionally. That is one beautiful disaster . 😉